Hey! I am Second AD!

Bruises. Shoe bite. Muscle pain.

For the first time in my life, i assisted a director on their shoot. I was the second AD (Assistant Director) - the last in hierarchy in the direction team of an ad film shoot.

When i chose filmmaking as my career, one thing i was sure of was that i wouldn't take the path of assisting a director for decades before getting a chance to make a film. That is how most people start off but from those who had done it and i had spoken to, i knew it was a crappy place for me to be in. But in Bombay, the first company i worked for shut down, i couldn't clear any interviews to other jobs, i was already unable to pay my rent and was moving towards abject penury. I would have taken any job.

My only actor friend told me that she might be able to help me. Her partner who also happened to be a director was making an ad film. He immediately asked me to join as an AD and i did. I needed the money. Badly. Little did i know that i was going to do a job that i would grow to love to bits. But yes, you have to keep this in mind. It might not be all that great if your director is bad. Mine was a great one and the best part about it was that he welcomed ideas from everyone. There was no shutting of doors based on hierarchy in that. Even a second AD could make suggestions and if they were good they would be accepted. That is something that doesn't happen very often. 
 
The work started many months ago, in November.The project got delayed and delayed. I had made a promise to myself. That i wouldn't quit this job. This was necessary because i knew for a fact that everyone else other than the director would be a pain to work with. That's the nature of films like these and i knew it the moment i went into the first meeting in the production house. There were a hundred things i wanted to object to. A hundred things i wanted to say and could not. It wasn't easy for me to keep my promise to myself but i did it anyway and i am awfully proud of myself. I did write a complaint letter but come on, one complaint letter in 6 months is nothing for my nature. 

For instance, during tech recce, the person who was the Director's Assistant (DA) shared his sandwich with me and remarked 'perks of having a wife.' I almost choked. I asked him what the perks of having a husband were. He said, with a knowing smile, 'many things'. I think he meant sex. That smile is the typical indian-men-talking-about-sex-smile. I didn't do anything except judge him. 

Till this project, i had only directed others. I had other ADs work for me and i knew how to do that job. But switching places, i realised it is great fun to be an AD too. As the shoot date nears, you have less and less time to think, worry about things, cry, have sex etc. During shoot, you will be required to be like wind. Everywhere and swishing past things and people and often carrying them with you while at it. 

You get to do everything. I got to work on costumes, managing extras, managing people, suffering people, negotiating and a hell of a lot more. This picture that looks like it's taken from a badly made horror film is the only picture i have got of the shoot. I took it to remember the position of actors in the scene while rehearsing with them. 

Everyone hated me and i hung in there. Everyone scolded me and i braved it. I cried only once, when a costume assistant said he wouldn't talk to me after i told on the walkie talkie that he wasn't working. I didn't know he could hear me but i wasn't lying. Even then i cried a lot. Not as much as i wanted to though because there wasn't enough time and not enough bathrooms or nooks to cry in. Everyone was everywhere. 

During shoot at least four people asked me if i was from 'South India'. South Indians work very hard, one person told me. Someone asked if i was from Mangalore. An actor spoke all the malayalam she knew to me. Which was 'do you want tea?' One person told me that he liked the way i worked but was too 'on the face'. I messed up a lot of things and learned even more. Look at this bandage i aged. I learned how to do it there, during shoot.

Even after shoot, after catching up on all the sleep, i can't wait to be back on it. There is no other way than to make a film, now. That's the only thing that will help me get back into that swiftness of action and thought that i so miss already. 
 
I told the Producer that the vanity van for women actors had a sexist sign. It was a sexualised image of a woman. She disagreed with me and said that i was wearing a sleeveless top too. I ignored the stupidity and asked her why the men's vanity van had no such design. Hopefully, that got her thinking. Oh, the letter i wrote, by the way was accusing her of discriminating against me on the basis of my class and colour of skin etc. 

Then there was the DoP (Director of Photography). He was white. When we met, he shook my hand and asked to the Associate Director who was sitting next to him if it was okay to shake hands with women in india. 'I got into trouble in Saudi Arabia once,' he said. It only got worse from there. When the Associate Director told him that living in London changed her life, he asked 'did you get married?' He would call me 'little mini elf'. I was too little to be anything, for him. He would always pinch me unexpectedly. I have a problem of getting startled even when someone calls out my name, pinching would just scare the living daylight out of me. He continued doing it even when he realised it startled me. 

He was very impressed with the perks-of-having-a-wife-DA. And he even called me 'little DA' once when i was anything but. But the strangest and the most annoying thing he did was during tech recce when he said he found out what to do with the DA when he went to pitch his projects. He took a little water and splashed it on the DA's crotch. He held his crotch, affecting embarrassment. I gave a cold look to the DoP and said that it wasn't funny. He said that i didn't count because i didn't have a sense of humour. Excuse me, but didn't he just ask me to look at a fellow worker's crotch after pouring water on it? I still haven't got the joke, honestly. 

I left after the director yelled 'it's a wrap' We had worked for more than 48 hours straight. It had changed my life and i was still unmarried.